Jesus: I am very much around
Me: It doesn't feel like that. Then what is the use?
Jesus: My main purpose is not utilitarian
Me: Then what are you doing?
Jesus: I help you to connect the dots even when I don't get involved with individual dots
Me: But I do sense your presence especially when things come together beautifully. I even see a personal touch to make me feel special. Sometimes when I have called out to you from the depth of your suffering you have answered me.
Jesus: May be you should treat it just as a proof of concept! (smiles)
Me: But other times when I am suffering and call out to you, I don't get a response. At least I don't get any response that I meets my need. So it becomes a 'torture by hope'.
Jesus: I hope you will sense my presence in both good times and bad times!
Me: I often feel abandoned, let down and very lonely
Jesus: This is part of being human. I can only say that I am with you even when you can't experience me. How can the omnipresent God be absent?
Me: May be you should make your presence felt
Jesus: Then you will only be interested in the miracles and not in the truth underlying the miracles. It is like people thinking more about Santa Claus than about me during Christmas!
Me: So what should I do?
Jesus: It is for you to figure it out! You have an entire lifetime for figuring it out for yourself!
Me: What about what others have already figured out?
Jesus: That is their truth. Walk with me and I will help you to figure out for yourself and do give me the benefit of doubt!
Me: Let me give it a try!