A conversation (Part 3)

Me: Where do you disappear when I need you the most?
Jesus: I am very much around
Me: It doesn't feel like that. Then what is the use?
Jesus: My main purpose is not utilitarian
Me: Then what are you doing?
Jesus: I help you to connect the dots even when I don't get involved with individual dots
Me: But I do sense your presence especially when things come together beautifully. I even see a personal touch to make me feel special. Sometimes when I have called out to you from the depth of your suffering you have answered me.
Jesus: May be you should treat it just as a proof of concept! (smiles)
Me: But other times when I am suffering and call out to you, I don't get a response. At least I don't get any response that I meets my need. So it becomes a 'torture by hope'.
Jesus: I hope you will sense my presence in both good times and bad times!
Me: I often feel abandoned, let down and very lonely
Jesus: This is part of being human. I can only say that I am with you even when you can't experience me. How can the omnipresent God be absent?
Me: May be you should make your presence felt
Jesus: Then you will only be interested in the miracles and not in the truth  underlying the miracles. It is like people thinking more about Santa Claus than about me during Christmas!
Me: So what should I do?
Jesus: It is for you to figure it out!  You have an entire lifetime for figuring it out for yourself!
Me: What about what others have already figured out?
Jesus: That is their truth. Walk with me and I will help you to figure out for yourself and do give me the benefit of doubt!
Me: Let me give it a try!

A conversation (Part 2)

Me: Why are you so unpredictable?
Jesus: Why do you want me to be predictable?
Me: So that I can understand you!
Jesus: And then predict my behaviour and then try to control me? (smiles) If you can control me then who is the God here?
Me: You have a point there. But may be I just want to relate to you better.
Jesus : For that what you need to do is to spend time with me.
Me: So we can only experience God and not understand God?
Jesus: It depends on your understanding of the word understanding! (smiles)
Me: Yes, it is difficult to differentiate between unknowable and unknown (not yet known)! May be if we experience you we can develop some hypotheses about you
Jesus: At your own risk (smiles). Remember, experience is dynamic. The cutting edge of experience is often too dynamic for understanding.
Yes: A static theology can't 'capture' dynamic experience of God
Jesus: Trying to 'capture' a limitless God in a limited mind and in an even more limited language is indeed a troublesome endeavour!

A conversation (Part 1)

Me : Hello Jesus! How are you?

(Jesus smiles)
Me: On hindsight, what a strange question to ask! It was a very human level question.
Jesus: I am more human than you think
Me: I know that being fully human AND fully God was your core miracle
Jesus: Was?
Me: Haven't you ceased to being human after you went back to heaven?
Jesus: After having made such a great effort to learn to be human, isn't it a waste to throw all hat learning away?
Me: Haven't you accomplished your mission on earth?
Jesus: Being the savior is not a one-time act. Yes, it happened once in one sense. But it keeps on happening in another sense.
Me : When I hear this, the image of Prometheus comes to my mind!
Jesus: Eagle eating his liver, the liver growing back to be eaten by the eagle again and then again growing back...?
Me: Yes! Come to think of it I think this image is rather neat. Prometheus was given this punishment for giving fire to the humans and you are supposed to be the light of the world!
Jesus: The myth speaks about stealing fire from the gods and giving it to humans. I didn't do any stealing (smiles)
Me: That I agree. Anyway, many of us on earth carry a crucifix (with your image still on the cross) and display your pictures with your wounds still intact!
Me: I feel like praying; but no words are coming to my mind
Jesus: That is perfectly fine with me. No words are required. Often, words are a distraction. Just be with me!